Freshman 10. . . or 15

At the request of one of my avid readers, I will now enlighten you with another post by me.

So, it turns out the dreaded "Freshman 15" is not a farce as I had so strongly presumed during my summer life in this college town.

I was like, "What the heck are they talking about? There is no such thing! I eat no junk. Why would I want to waste my precious dinero on such crap? I walk all over the place. There is no. such. thing."

Then real college began.

I was wrong.

So wrong.

This Freshman 15 is actually a conspiracy act passed down through the hierarchy of college control boards against freshmen students that succeeds due to the naivety and general lack of pension of these recent high school grads.

A.k.a. They give us a bunch free food. On purpose. And it's free. So everyone eats it. Because it's FREE! But guess what. It's crap.

Take, for example, my diet this past week.

I have twice been given pizza, thrice ice cream, hot dogs, sloppy joes, chips, creamies and more creamies, candy, cookies, pop, creamies, brownies galore, and of course creamies. It's insane.

They expand our stomachs and then they fill them to the brim and they don't let them empty a little before they are overflowing again!

They want us to be fat and that's just the truth.

It is a conspiracy if I ever saw one.

So if I'm a little bigger next time you see me, please just pretend all is well and carry on with your life.

The Foundation

Well, here I am at 1:08 a.m. Typical college student. We're trying to figure out the names of the boys that are in our FHE group so we can pounce on them before the other group of girls does (it's a 2:1 girl/boy ratio. Lame, right?). UK isn't home yet, and we're getting a little worried about her because we've been seeing her sneaking around with this boy from Colorado. But I kind of like her being gone, because then I get the room to myself and I can do whatever I please. Anyway, let's all pray for her safe return.

My roomies are awesome, well the 4 that I know. The girl who I'll refer to as Mia is the 5th and I've seen her probably for a grand total of 30 seconds in passing. Cali is probably the most outgoing and we just finished an hour long converstion. She's so funny and there is never an awkward pause with her. Texas is very down-to-earth, but she laughs a lot and she's fun to joke around with. Washington is quiet, but she's really nice and it's not like she's super quiet. Just not a conversation initiator.

No boys yet. According to my recent findings, however, I believe that I'm interested in upperclassmen. They are way cooler than freshman and they know what they're doing in terms of talking to girls.

We have these things called Y groups which are sort of like EFY. We even have wristbands, which I do not approve of. The girls in my group are all super cool and I made like, 50 friends almost instantly. The boys are another story. Not cute, not social, not intelligent. But that's okay right? Since I don't plan on getting involved with boys. Not seriously anyway.


I know this post was uncharacteristically unoriginal, but I can't post about anything original until I've got the basic foundations of my new life out of the way. So, here you are.





PS- I'm not currently in possession of a camera, so you're going to have to deal with my lack of visual evidence. Not like I ever post my own pics on here anyway.

Are we human? Or are we sheep?

Thoughts from Thursday on Social Groups

Okay I just BARELY noticed that it's Thursday and it's 11:08 pm. This is what happens when you become a busy college student. And I'm not even in real college yet. Yikes.

Well, here's the deal yo. What is with all these people coming here from high school and hanging out with all the people from their high school? Why are people like this? Why is it so hard to get out of your comfort zone?

I'm not saying it's not hard for me, I'm asking this question about myself too.

Today I ate lunch with 6 other people I knew from high school. I wasn't even friends with most of them in high school, but we just naturally kind of mesh together because we have that same background, you know? And we didn't plan on eating together. It just happens. When you are alone at lunch time and you see one face that you at least recognize, you tend to gravitate to it because apparently we humans like to digest with familiar people. It's so lame.

It is unnaturally hard for me to make friends and I have no clue why. I'm not even shy.

In fact, I am outgoing and I like talking to people and I'm not even scared of it, but I just hate being alone and trying to make friends with groups, I guess. I don't know. I'm confused.

Last night I went to a bbq by myself. I couldn't find one single person who looked familiar (besides some guys from high school, and no flippin way) so I left. I could not, no matter how bad I wanted to, force myself to invite myself into a group. Because they are all circled, you know, and it's just not natural to walk up and invite yourself in.

So I left, as I said. But then Henrietta told me (over the phone, of course) to be brave and go back and talk to someone.

So I did.

And guess who I saw. Two of my new roommates who do not have nicknames yet, and I don't have time to give them any right now.

So I hung out with them and it was so fun. They are so cool. But that's the thing. I already knew them. I didn't have to go talk to some random stranger.

Ugh.

What if I don't make friends fast enough and everyone forms their friendship groups and then I will never be able to get in, you know? This is ridiculous!

Anyway, I have noticed that a lot of people are hanging out with all their high school peeps. Like, there will be a group of people and you will ask them where they are from and they will all be from the same place. How lame is that?!

Why?

WHY?!

I always thought sheep were totally stupid and directionless.

Turns out we/I am the same way.

*Just so you know, I just typed all this out without ANY thinking/editing on my part. It's just pure, organic thought whipped out my finger tips on a whim. Take it lightly. Maybe I will be a little deeper later. Don't count on it. Yo.

Freakin Ridiculous

1. Homework during summer. It's a break people. A BREAK. That means you don't do homework.
2. Driving behind a grandma going 29 in a 40 zone.
3. Stop lights turning red on you to let cars go through the other way. But wait, there are no cars wanting to go the other way. So I must stop for no reason.
4. White walls. They are prison.

5. Expiration dates.

6. Hair.

7. Basically a week of postless blog.

8. Paying to do laundry. What the crap? Someone should be paying ME to do my laundry.

9. Finding your clothes still wet after paying a dollar for the drier to dry them.

10. Watching yourself insert another dollar to give the stupid machine a second chance at completing its job the right way.

But guess what. I don't even care because tomorrow is college. Real live college. Actually it's more like fake college since the real thing doesn't start til Monday.

But it counts.

I'm a grown up, yes I am. I'm a grown up, slam, jam, BAM.

Here is a shout out to GP who is MOVING OUT tomorrow. What's up with this? Me going to college, you moving out, what's next?

GP, let me give you one last piece of wisdom before your big day:

Don't leave your cork board of dreams empty for days. Fill it up right away so you can get started immediately on your awesome life. Okay? Was that deep, or what? Do you even know what I'm talking about since I didn't tell you about my cork board?

Whatev.

Good luck to all on good old August 25.

Awkward Situations Part III

One night, I was flossing in front of the mirror that is right by my bedroom door. The door was open. Lavoisier walked by, facing the other direction. I looked over at her. Guess what.

She was not wearing underwear.

Would you like to know how I know? Because she wasn't wearing any pants.

She was just walking around with a shirt on and NOTHING else!

When she came back down the hall, she stopped by my room to talk to me for a sec while I flossed.

That's right. I had a full on conversation with a bottomless woman. And trust me, I didn't forget it the entire time.

Sorry, Lavoisier. That may be normal in Europe, but here in the US, or at least in Utah, we wear clothes. It's just polite, you know?

This leads me to believe that I would faint if I ever travelled internationally because of all the new visual experiences I would be having.

Maybe I should reconsider any big travel plans for the future, and stick to the clothed?

Mm, nah.

Awkward Situations Part II

My roommate has a best friend. All summer I have been hearing about this best friend of hers.

They have so much fun. And would you like to hear something great? They have the same name. It's adorable. So we are going to call my roommate Dashboard and her bff will be Confessional. Get it?

One day, Dashboard says to me excitedly, "I think Confessional is coming over tomorrow! She's going to bring some friends. I don't know any of them. I told her I will provide brownies and ice cream. I think we're just going to hang out outside most of the time because she has a friend that can't get up the stairs very well, I guess."

I said, "Sweet. Sounds fab."

The next day I went boating. But the weather was bad so we had leave early.

I got home around 3 to behold three people on the couch. Dashboard was on the right, and Confessional was on the left, sitting on the lap of some mystery man who we will call Charger.

Yes. Confessional and Charger were "all over each other" if I may say so. I didn't know it was possible to be a third wheel in your own house, but somehow Dashboard had managed it. She was just sitting there on the couch next to them. It was strange.

And guess what else. Charger had no lower legs. Now, I'm not against legless people, I'm just saying, it added to the awkwardness of the situation. He and Confessional kept making references to them.

I wanted a snack and since the kitchen is connected to the living room, I got to spend the next few minutes conversing with these three. Charger and Confessional were constantly talking about marriage and they both had rings on their fingers. So I said, "Are you two engaged?"

"Well, not officially. His parents would kill him if we told them we were engaged right now."

Seriously, if they were not talking about marriage, they were talking about how Charger's parents would flip at this and freak at that, and they kept acting like his parents were so strict.

And then Charger says this: "Well, my dad does say, 'Why get married when you're getting what you want?'" And he busts up laughing.

And then Confessional says: "Well, we haven't. . ."

And Charger says: "Ya, I know. . ." And continues laughing his face off.

Oooookaay. Uh. What?

And poor Dashboard is just sitting there on the couch next to these two.

Can you imagine that? You think your bff is going to come chill with you and lo and behold, she has found a new bff and it's a boy and they are basically engaged and you had no idea.

When they left I asked Dashboard, "So, did you know Charger before today?"

She said, "Nope. This was my first time meeting him."

"That would be...weird."

"Ya. It was."

Right then and there I made a pledge that I will never do that to someone, especially my bff. That is just harsh. If that happened to me, I would probably cry my eyes out. Or punch someone. Ew. GP, please at least warn me when you are nearly married, okay? Thanks.

Awkward Situations Part I

Last week, Stats asked if I wanted to join her and her friend (we shall call him Mr. Pod since he is the one that made the comment from yesterday's post) on a nighttime hike.

Now, I know the only reason I get invited to do anything like this is because I'm the one with a car and they need a ride. So they "invite" me. And then I drive. It's a win-win. Usually.

We got to the start of the trail at 9:00 pm and began our trek.

Our goal: Wind Cave.

We made it to our destination a little after 10. It was magnificent.

The cave was actually really more like a tunnel because you could go all the way through it.

Anyway, you could sit in it and look out at the canyon. Or you could sit on top and see all the stars AND the canyon. So that's what we did.

Here's where the awkward comes in.

We were all sitting there on the rock, when Stats decides to go lay down on this flat rock a few feet away so she can get a better view. Two seconds later, Mr. Pod decides to join her on that rock. So those two were laying on that rock over there and I was just sitting over here alone on this other rock.

And then they were being all weird. They were constantly doing this bantery-fake/realish-arguing stuff. And they would just laugh really hard at absolutely nothing and it was just strange. It was like they didn't actually think it was funny, but they were just in the mood to laugh so they would force it out and act like they weren't forcing it.

But it was obvious.

So I just sat there in silence on my own and pretended they weren't there.

But it gets worse.

Around 11 we were kind of done looking at the stars/canyon, so we stood to leave.

(P.S. Conversations in this post are not directly quoted.)

Stats: Oh I'm so tired. . . I feel dizzy. . . I can't hike all the way down tonight. . . I don't want to fall off the mountain. . . Let's just sleep in the cave.

Mr. Pod: Ya! Let's do. That would be awesome.

Me: No flippin way am I sleeping in a cave. It is way too cold. I won't be able to sleep at all. Besides, that is just weird.

Stats: Come on. I can't hike all the way back down. It would be fun! You could tell all your friends you slept in a cave.

Me: Uh. No. Are you kidding me? No.

Stats: Well, we have the flashlight and you can't just hike all the way down by yourself.

I lost.

So we went down in the cave and guess what. Stats and Mr. Pod proceeded to lay down on the cave floor, in the middle of the dirt. Like they were actually planning on getting some sleep!

So I found a clean little jut in the wall of the cave and sat down.

Stats and Mr. Pod: You're going to be cold over there. Come lay down by us and we can all keep each other warm. You won't get any sleep if you sit there the whole time.

Me: Uh, I'm not planning on sleeping. I'm just going to sit here all night until you two decide you can hike back down. I'll sleep tomorrow.

And thus we sat/laid there in silence.

Around midnight, we heard voices. Then a flashlight shined down on us. But guess what. I was the only one visible because Stats and Mr. Pod were laying behind this wall thing.

So this group of hikers start checking everything out while my hiking buddies sit up and dust off.

The hikers said a few things to us, and Stats and Mr. Pod responded from behind their wall.

Then I heard a girl from those hikers say, "Is she alone?"

And a guy responded, "No, I think there's a guy with her."

Since I'm the only one they can see, they think it's me and some guy just sitting there in the cave in the silent darkness. Uh. Ya I felt dumb.

Fortunately, these hikers caused my own two friends to realize the awkwardness of the whole situation and suddenly they felt like they had enough energy to hike down the mountain tonight, without fainting or falling off.

Thank you. But next time, do you think you could find your energy reserves a little sooner so we don't have to go through this strangeness again?

Thank you.

So down we hiked. And then I had to drive them home in silence while they soiled my seats with the dirt that stuck to them as they laid on the cave floor.

Let's just say, this little adventure we had was so not worth it.

My Pod

Would you like to hear the comment a certain individual made about the contents of my ipod on Friday?

"I've seen some pretty embarrassing ipods in my day, but I think this one tops them all."

Pffft. Excuse me?

I'm not embarrassed.

I love my pod. Even though the only thing on it is HSM and Shania Twain.

I still love it.

And I will continue to love it til the day I die, no matter what anyone says about it.

So there.

Post Script

Yesterday morning, Lavoisier and I sat on the couch to enjoy a nice conversation one last time before she left. It was special.

She gave me a whole list of things I need to do and places I need to go and things I need to eat in this lovely town. She has books and pamphlets on things you can do here and she put exclamations next to all the good ones. She wrote down all the good things to order at all the good restaurants. Good.

And then she left me with this last piece of advice. And I quote, "You should get a boyfriend. Well, first you should go to Europe. Then you should get a boyfriend."

And then she left. Tear, tear. But I have her address so we can be pen pals. She said I could either get a facebook or promise to write her letters. I chose letters.

One place she told me I had to go was the farmers market they have on Saturdays.

So, after she left, that is exactly where I went.

It was by this adorable park with a big playground a river running through it.

There were a bunch of venders selling things like vegetables, breads, honey, pastries, jewelry, accessories, milk, eggs, rugs, aprons, furniture, and everything else you can think of.

There was a little band thing with old ladies singing songs. They were actually pretty good. And they really weren't that old.

And there was fresh lemonade.

The whole thing was just charming.

Here are my purchases from the morning:

An adorable little clutch, and two rings. All homemade.

I bought this from an old lady. She put it in a little bag and said, "Wear it in good health!"

Don't you worry ma'm. I most definitely will.

Wickedness sometimes is happiness

As you know, I'm in love with Alias. As you also know, I had to wait a week for the third season because some obscure man is one measly season ahead of me. When I was done with season three and went into the library for season four, guess what happened? You're exactly right. It wasn't there. And when I searched the library database I was devastated to discover that it was not due back for another week. So I went home, heartbroken. Throughout the course of the week, I mused about how this situation was not going to work out for me, seeing as I'm leaving for college in a short week and a half and I still have two seasons to feast my eyes upon and I just don't have the time to do all this waiting around.

The next Wednesday, I got a brilliant, albeit malicious idea. Season four was due back the next day, and the man who had it would dump it into the return box and then run to the movie aisle all excited to jump into season five without having to wait ONE DAY.

I'm all for justice in the world, and after spinning the situation through my head I concluded that it was simply not fair for this man to be able to breeze through every season uninterrupted, and I have to wait behind him like an impatient dog every week. So I did it. Even though I had not yet seen season four, I TOOK SEASON FIVE. I know, it was basically a satanic thing to do. But guess how I felt after I checked out those four DVD's that constituted season 5? I was ELATED. I was grinning like a crazy woman walking out of the library. There may even have been a few laugh-out-louds in the car on the way home. Believe it or not, I had done a wicked thing, and I was happy.
I could just visualize that man, dumping season four into the return box the next day, running to the movie aisle, bending down to the lowest shelf in anxious aniticipation. He would trail his pudgy finger across seasons 1, 2, 3....but wait, season 5 was not there! How could that be? He would search again, and then maybe one more time for good measure. Then I would pop up behind him in a ghostly, transparent form and say, "Hello! My name is Indigo Montoyo. You killed my father, prepare to die!"
Jk, jk. I would say "You know, no matter how many times you scan that shelf, season 5 is not going to appear. (*long pause*) Because guess what, you miserable vomitous mass?

I have it.

Muahahahaha!"

That Was a Smashed Bambi!

That is what Lavoisier exclaimed as we drove past a dead deer on the side of the road yesterday.

Sadly, this Austrian roommate of mine is going to find her way back home tomorrow, and I will never see her again.

This post is tribute.

What I like about Lavoisier:

1. She is genuine. Genuinely nice. Genuinely funny. Genuinely caring.

2. She can carry on an intelligent conversation, and while she's at it, she engages everyone in the room.

3. She likes all my food.

4. She has common sense.

5. She doesn't argue.

6. She knows what she believes and why she believes it.

7. She smiles a lot.

The other day she was telling me about her weekend in Denver with this guy from work she likes and she said, "I have to take care not to fall in love!" It was adorable. And so funny.

Good luck, Lavoisier! You have changed my life.

If you're an ugly guy, there's basically nothing to be done about it.

Thoughts from Thursday on GP's Writing

I have finally determined what makes GP's posts so good.

She's smart.

And not the stupid, show off, use big words, don't even get what you are saying because you are a brainiac, kind of smart.

She does use smart words, but they are understandable, and used in the appropriate context.

She has a certain flow, you know?

Not everyone can write like this. In fact, most people can't.

For example: Her explanation of Alias. It's the most complicated plot ever and she explains it so perfectly, it almost seems easy.

And her sentence structure is just phenomenal. You have no idea.

Listen to this. In yearbook, she had to write the TSA page. She knew nothing about TSA.

But the copy was due.

So she just whipped out this incredible, organized, smart copy right then and there and hands it in.

The next day in class the teacher gave a speech about us needing to step it up on our copy and what not and then she says, "If you want to see an example of good writing, go read the TSA page..."

What?

Ya, she is that good.

As her bff, this skill of hers has provided me with at least two perks:

1. She posts on this blog once a week to my utter enjoyment, entertainment, and thorough delight.

2. I would always get joint credit for her work in yearbook. Just because we're always together, doesn't mean we are the same person or even have the same set of skills, okay people? For example, the end of the teacher's sentence went like this, "...go read the TSA page that GP and Brittan wrote."

Uh, ya I wrote that...

Sweet.

There is one other thing I like about her writing, aside from the intelligent factor, and it is this:

You know when you are talking and you say the word "like?"

"I was walking down the street and I saw like five squirrels."

Well, when GP is writing with that word, she uses it as an appositive.

I was walking down the street and I saw, like, five squirrels.

Love it. I laugh every time.

Guess What I Saw Today

How to Train Your Dragon.

I told you, with all the movies I'm seeing these days, I could basically become the president of Rotten Tomatoes on demand and give you the reviews.

This one gets 4.9 out of 5 stars. (You can never get 5. Really.)

I was laughing basically the whole time.

And I think something is wrong with me. At the end when it's getting all intense, I was totally stressing out! It's a cartoon for crying out loud. It's obvious how it's going to end.

But I just let myself get a little too into it. I think I'm going to give myself an ulcer with all this high adventure in my life.

My 2 favorite lines were:

1. Ya, I know, right? Pain. Looove it.

2. And the spinning. Thank you for nothing, you useless reptile.

So funny. He says that second one with absolutely no emotion at all and I just died laughing.

I think I'm easily entertained.

But who wouldn't be for 3 dollars?

It's a good thing college starts in 2 short weeks.

I need my life back.

That's nasty. I'm gonna go throw up. In 305. Where the hot water doesn't work.

Yesterday I went to another movie.

I swear all I do these days is go to movies. And I never get to pick them either. It's always one of my roommates that wants to see something and they ask if I want to come. I don't want to be responsible for my roommates' loneliness in the theater! So I always say yes.

Last night it was The Karate Kid.

I was not excited to see it. I thought it would be dumb. But I was wrong.

I thoroughly enjoyed every second of it and I am not lying.

I've never seen the first one, so that may be why, but no matter. I still liked it.

Yes, the kid was a little brat and needed to learn some manners, but he was so cute. And I loved his mom.

I loved how he cried when his teacher told him about the car accident that killed his fam. It was adorable.

I also loved when they were climbing all those stairs on the mountain to get to the magic water, and then they reached the top and the kid just slammed his head in the water and while he was drinking he gripped the side of the bowl thing. It was hilarious.

And when he tried to control his mom with his mind. That was cute.

And when he took that music girl for a fun afternoon. Ah, it was just great.

And when he says "agua" for water. To the chinese people. Ha.

You should watch it.

Am I Dreaming?

Warning: You may feel a sudden urge to MOVE HERE when you see these pictures.

Ten points if you can tell me which of these pics is my favorite.

Ode to Tess

After watching the BBC version of Tess last week, I went to Barnes and Noble and bought an expensive hardback edition, for the sole purpose of feeling like I owe Tess more meaning in my life. It's now sitting on my window seat, tucked between all my other favorite books. I haven't opened it. I can't bring myself to open it, and now I'm thinking that it was a one-time read for me, because I know that no matter how happy some parts might be and no matter how much I wish that things would turn out differently, it's always going to end in a completely unfair, heart-wrenching tragedy that is quite difficult to handle and takes days to get over.

As for the movie, however, I couldn't help but pick it up when I saw it at the library. It was two years ago when I first watched it, so the emotional effects had long since worn off, and I figured I would watch it again for old time's sake. I know I already told you about me watching it last week, but I'm going to expound a little bit. I was babysitting (don't worry, the kid was asleep) when I saw the second half. I was all alone downstairs. And you know how I rarely cry. And I almost never cry during movies. But believe me when I tell you that I was on the verge of hysteria at the end. Both my nose and mascara were running at ridiculous rates, and I was afraid I was going to wake up the baby with all my sobbing. (Can you imagine this? Because even I hardly can.) The directors and producers did a FANTASTIC job and basically got every part of the book right, and the actors did a perfect job of portraying the characters. No matter how much I loved it though, it's still emotionally draining. That's how powerful it is. I probably won't watch it again for years. I would recommend it to you, but since we all know that you aren't the most adept at identifying with complex, emotionally charged characters in books and movies, I don't think you'll love Tess as much as I do, which will probably offend me, but at least then you can understand all this ranting I do about it. If you're never going to read it you should at least watch the movie.

Anyway, the point of this post is lost on me. Make of it what you will. I just think that Tess is one incredible woman, and I'm in the mindset of integrating her story into my life. Even though I can't bring myself to read the book again, it still deserves a special place on my shelf, and I'm definitely going to name one of my daughters after her.

Post Numero Cincuenta

That's right people. I am a veteran blogger. This post marks fifty and I am still going strong.

In celebration, I will now make a list of fifty things I like.

This list is not complete/not well thought through/not thought through at all/not in order/just done to do it. So don't be offended/mad if I leave anything off that you think should be there because I probably do like that, I just didn't happen to think of it at this time, okay? And I'm not doing people because then I would just have to list all the people I know. That I like, of course. But famous people can make the list. Because they don't even count as people, right?

Here goes.

1. Blogging.

2. Psych.

3. The word "livid."

4. Cemeteries.

5. Driving.

6. My ipod.

7. Church.

8. The smell of rice cooking.

9. Writing in my journal.

10. Blue pens.

11. Rings.

12. John Mayer.

13. Popcorn.

14. Getting mail.

15. Free stuff including food, t-shirts, car washes, etc.

16. Muscles.

17. Kids!

18. Sleeping.

19. Ants on a log.

20. Healthy stuff.

21. Running.

22. Making lists.

23. Fast Sundays.

24. Boys opening doors for girls.

25. Motorcycles.

26. Painting my toenails.

27. Using change.

29. Laughing.

30. Playing the piano.

31. Fans.

32. Peyton Manning.

33. Christmas.

34. Scrapbooks.

35. Emperor's New Groove.

36. Traditions.

37. Thunder storms.

38. Basketball.

39. Strawberry chapstick.

40. Thinking.

41. Photo booths. (You know, with the strips of pics.)

42. People watching.

43. Wrinkled noses.

44. Cell phones.

45. Childhood memories.

46. Intelligent conversations.

47. Spanish.

48. Having a clean car.

49. Summer.

50. Spontaneous activities.

51. Skipping the number 28. Just for fun.

Okay, that was not even hard! I could have easily gone on for 100 more.

Happy fifty!

If You Chance to Meet a Frown

Thoughts from Thursday on My Face

As you all know very well, my "normal" face can come off as not so normal.

More like plain ornery.

I'm sorry. I was born like that and sometimes it's kind of hard to just change things you were born with on a whim, you know?

But guess what.

I have.

I know, shocking. Over the past few months, I have become increasingly aware of my facial expression at every second of the day. It's kind of exhausting to try to look pleasant and interested at all times. All times. Even if I am just sitting there.

Now, I am far from perfect on my face here, but I have greatly improved. I have 2 pieces of evidence that qualify me to make this announcement.

1. It has been quite awhile since I have heard anything such as, "You know, it doesn't hurt to smile..." or anything else of the sort.

2. My institute teacher has commented on my smile. . . wait for it. . . four times! I repeat: FOUR TIMES. And he doesn't just whip out these smile comments to everyone as they walk out the door; I have listened to make sure of that. Nope, I am the only one he has said that to. Not once, not twice, but four times.

Oh let's make it three pieces of evidence:

3. When I look at people as I walk down the street with my pleasant face on, they smile and say hi to me, often times before I even do it.

Is that not great?

Now I have some visual evidence. I love that phrase "visual evidence." That's why I use it on as many posts as I can. And I was having some major problems getting these pics so sorry for the tiny size.

Okay maybe I'm getting a little too good at my face. Let's try for a more normal one.

You see that? I am getting better...

The Lizard is a No Go: Meet Seth

As promised, Stats and I went to the pet store yesterday in search of some crickets and a lizard.

But who knew lizards are 75 dollars??

We didn't get one.

We got Seth instead. He was only 7 dollars.

7 dollars of pure amphibian adorableness! He likes to take baths in his water.

And hang out on his misty wall. Look at the little suction cups at the end of his finger things. They are awesome.

And look at these precious eyes.

Guess what Seth likes to eat...

Yes those are living, breathing crickets. They are absolutely DISGUSTING.

But apparently Seth finds them appetizing in the most delicious way. This is what he looks like just seconds before he EATS one. That is correct, we witnessed a murder. It was so cool. He slowly crept over and sat there in the middle of the cage as you see below. He sat super still for 10 whole seconds and then BAM he just whipped out and snatched a poor little cricket before he even knew what was coming! Then his body did all these weird things to get his food down. It was so crazy.

Oh the great times we will have with our new dorm member. But really I don't think we are allowed to have pets. Let's just keep this on the down low, okay?

P.S. What gender do you think little Seth is?

Give Me Your Palm, I Shall Predict Your Future

Yes, GP. I am talking to you.

Since you are moving out in 23 days to be exact (you're moving out on the 25th right?), I decided to tell you what you have to look forward to on your average Sunday evening in college.

This is all based on what happened yesterday on my average Sunday evening of course, but I think it will apply to you because...well...it just does.

1. You will want to make mashed potatoes for din din, but you will find that you don't have a potato masher. So you will use a blender. You will discover that your potatoes are a little too whipped and runny and just plain strange. Then you will say, "Note to self: Don't mash potatoes in a blender."

Sorry, no pic. You'll just have to trust me.

2. You will decide to make chocolate crinkle cookies for dessert. But you won't have a cake mix of course (which is what the recipe calls for) so you will use a brownie mix instead. You will find that brownie mix does not have quite the same effect. Your cookies will just be a big bunch of flat. But they will still taste good. So you will eat them anyway. And then you will say, "Note to self: Don't make chocolate crinkle cookies with brownie mix."

Flat crinkle cookies.

3. You will be sitting there on a stool staring at some muffins that have been on the counter for weeks. Literally. Then you will start touching them and noticing how ROCK HARD they are. You will think to yourself, "I wonder if these babies will shatter if I drop them hard enough." Then you will think, "Why wonder when I can experiment?" And guess what you will do next. That's right, you will take out your screen and proceed to drop the muffins out the window one at a time. And guess what. They do indeed shatter. Into a million pieces. It's quite a sight.

Empty plate where muffins resided for the last couple weeks.

Muffin shattered into a million pieces.

4. You will feel the need to be a little prankster for the evening. So you will go to the next building over and turn off all the power switches in the guys' apartment. Then you will sprint down the stairs as fast as possible so you won't get caught. But they obviously know it is you, so by the time you make it back to your apartment, you will see that they have shut off your power in return. Good thing it just takes a finger flick to turn it back on. You will revel in your cleverness.

Power box with the said switches.

5. And what would a day be without staying up til midnight to do a slip n slide in the sprinklers? It just wouldn't be complete, I tell you. And you can't forget the bubble bath to make it more slippery. Bubble gum scented, of course. Note to self: Do this every single night this week because, yes, it was THAT awesome.

Bubble gum scented bubble bath.

Me, post slip n slide adventure. SO FUN.

Yes that is what you have to look forward to. You are going to LOVE it. Yes you are.

Oh ya, and tonight we are going to the pet store to buy some crickets to let loose in the guys' apartment.

Also we are going to buy a lizard so we will be prepared when they try to stick the crickets back in our dorm. Plus we kind of just want a dorm pet. So we're going to get one. Boo ya.

They're Too Sexy For Their Shirts

I would like to prove to the world that I have the most handsome little brothers on the face of the planet.

This is Bwayee, the napkin note writer. I had already seen this picture when it was first taken so I was already prepared for its awesomeness. But I wasn't prepared for this next one:

Look at this! This is my baby bro who does not have a blog name at the moment. Seriously, when I saw this picture, I just stared at it for like 2 minutes straight. Honestly, look at him! I love it. With all of my heart.

Oh, you wanna see some more? No prob.

That's right. Those are MY brothers.